The Highs and Lows of ADHD

Like life, ADHD isn’t as simple as a set of either inconveniences, or superpowers. It is both. The highs and lows of ADHD for me all come down to feeling, for me. You’re able to feel on top of the world from hearing your favourite music live, and then flat out empty days later when you are home from the trip. You will be moved to tears by the beauty of New Zealand’s lakes, accidentally binge watch a tv show in a matter of days. Your heart will break when the characters are no longer in your life,  you’ll worry about them in the shower. (I wish I was joking) The Bold Type, during lockdown anyone? Just while we are here did anyone see the Season 5 finale? Richard, I am fuming. 

But it also makes you deeply empathetic, creative, novelty seeking, paint with all the colours of the rainbow, gorgeous people. We can crave time with our people, but then need to sit quietly for hours after being with our best friends. 

Often feeling like lone wolves, we crave deep social connections, with people we feel safe with.

Social injustice cuts us to our core, you can read more about that here. Speaking personally I can’t think of anything more rewarding than helping people. So I guess we can agree that trait is pretty hard wired, not that I would want to change that.

group of volunteers ADHD highs and lows
The sun setting over the Indian Ocean, perfectly capturing a wave crashing over a rock. the highs of adhd

There have been times when I wished I felt less. 

Imagining what life would be like if I could live in a happy medium, beige middle ground world. That the break ups didn’t physically hurt my chest, twist my stomach, and leave me unable to eat for days. 

But with that, would I also lose the feeling when the beat drops in house music? A new crush messages me? A plate of spaghetti makes me do a little happy dance? My heightened intuition? Sunsets over the ocean feeling like poetry in motion?

Even though I can have days where I really struggle with my contrasting emotions, I am not sure I would want it any other way. Hi Brain, I love you. Yes my lows can, and have been low. But my highs are stunning, breathtaking moments that I wouldn’t trade for the world. They fuel me to live outside of the box, travel the world, meet likeminded people, follow my dreams, and do my best to put myself out into the world authentically. They are the reason I am so tuned in to the people I love. It’s why I can take the emotional temperature of every room I walk into. My intuition was born from this too. And because I so acutely pick up on peoples pain, I find myself empathising, and wanting to help. They are the reason, I am me. And I am learning that she is pretty great.

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